Shine on You Crazy Diamond

I can only hear the sound of the guitar playing smooth in the background of nothingness. and a pinch of sax transitions in... and the smoke that I just swallowed, only as I try and hold on to it because I want to remain in the emptiness, leaves me. I only want to live in this music. In this moment. The song doesn’t mean anything to me. It’s just the sound of it. The groove that it carves only for me to comfortably sink in… I give in. The voice doesn’t mean a thing. It’s the sound of it. The pace, it makes me the docile follower… My cigarette moves to my lips and back by my side and it is almost mechanical. Am I even thinking as I write this… I am in doubt. Maybe I am just falling… and will continue to fall until I find a place to rest. Blankness is the ultimate feeling… time has no value. What was he thinking when he created it? What is it about this piece of sound. Is it as basic as just that… because it consumes me completely… my eyes don’t matter because I don’t see nothing anyway… maybe it is what he says… shine… I want to shine… like a diamond… like a crazy diamond… the taste of that cigarette only wakes me up to write on… I start watching the smoke taking free shape as it becomes one with space… its going nowhere… but I follow it… and as the song plays on… plays on my blank mind… it hypnotises me into a worse state of emptiness… and when I feel my fingers burn… with all the obstinate urge to foolishly follow rooted in me… I reach for another cigarette and push the play button one more time… I see the candle on my table dying out… the sound commands a crossfire in my mind to find meaning in nothing at all… and I’m looped in this deception song… it should never end… I beg for it rule my senses… foreve... be my escape... [cough]

Over the Hills and Far Away

This world can be divided into two kinds of people; Ones who live in this world and the ones who live. Both have lives. And have a choice of wanting to victimize their time to routines.

Don’t you think that life now is driven by what’s not today. Normal life is driven by what’s not there. City life is driven by what’s never going to be. People on the other side don’t understand these statements, and will never be able to.

It’s them I want to talk about here; the ones who live. Simply live. No matter what or where. That’s where I want to be. Nonetheless, I presume that I am almost there by admitting that I am not there yet.

My life is filled with everything that I could ever want to be exposed to. This and that and that and this as well. Only, it’s so much that I can’t do enough in one lifetime to fill all of that into one plate. Irony sets in when I begin to complain of monotony in life. I have so much happening in my life, I find that setting things right takes too much of my time. Sorting out problems. Planning of a hundred things that I can do tomorrow.

Exhaustion! Imagine getting tired of living life. That’s the only thing I came here, on this planet, to do!

It only brings a smile to my face when I think of what I would want to do to cut the monotony off. I want to do what Chris and Robert do in the book I’m reading right now. Now that according to me is living life. Just take your motorcycle and pick out a route on the map that leads from nowhere to nowhere and follow just that. Actually in this case follow or not will mean the same thing.

The long winding roads. Sunset and sunrises like never before. Warm air carrying the dry smell of mud and old trees. Lonely sounds of the motor as I make no change in the pace I ride at, finding no need think. Discovering undiscovered roads leading nowhere and riding off. Chasing horizons until I tire and submit to a reality that I chose to momentarily forget. Stopping at monotonous long stretches of empty, uninhabited lands and staring, this time with a purpose, a paradox…

I take a deep breath, feeling almost like I am consuming every particle of nature around me and begin to look... I search in these unending insipid spaces, something to spice my life up moving at the speed of a million decisions a minute.